Life is all about continuous progress: the ability to move forward and to achieve greatness. You cannot hope to ever achieve such things if you are holding on to things from your past.
All this will do is prevent you from reaching your full potential. By holding on to past ideals, you are self-sabotaging any progress you hope to make. You need to make peace with your past and learn to accept things the way they are, whether it makes sense or not.
Coming to peace with certain realities is what will allow you to move on from the past in order to have a great future. Once you let go of the things in life that are holding you back, the quicker you will be able to achieve your goals. You need to give up certain things in order to fully commit yourself to the life you want to obtain.
Start eliminating your concern regarding the following and see what a difference that will make in your life.
1. Other people’s opinion
This is something far too many people worry about. This is inherently problematic, as you cannot change someone else’s opinion. Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion even if you do not agree with it or it’s completely inaccurate. You just have to concentrate on living the best possible life for yourself that you can. People who engage in incessant gossip are unhappy with their own lives so they seek to degrade others to try and enhance their self-worth. The kicker is that this will leave them just as miserable as before.
At one point or another, you are going to realize that sometimes there just isn’t a reasonable explanation as to why something occurred the way it did. You can spend all the time you want rehashing things in your mind, trying to make sense of a situation, but honestly you may never come to a realization. This is something that takes a lot of time and experience to realize, but once you do, it really can make all the difference.
The sooner you stop expecting people to act in certain ways, the happier you will be. Allow yourself to be pleasantly surprised by the actions of others instead of becoming disappointed when they don’t follow through in the manner in which you thought they would. You can only control your actions, not those of others, so it’s simply in your best interest to let people act the way they will without creating false hope.
4. Mistakes you made in the past
The past is over and if you have done all you can do to make up for your mistakes, then there is nothing else you can do at this point. If people throw this in your face, then you need to cut these people out of your life. It’s as simple as that. Everyone makes mistakes, it’s a part of growing up. As long as you correct your mistakes and learn from them, then that should be all there is to it.
5. Dwelling on heartbreak
Just because it didn’t work out with one person doesn’t mean it won’t work out with someone else. Rather than allowing your past to pull you down and harmfully impact your future, use your experiences to grow and learn about yourself. The people you meet in life come at the time they do for a reason. Don’t waste your time replaying incidents over and over in your head trying to make sense of them. If your relationship didn’t work out, it’s okay, take it as a lesson learned and carry that into your future.
There is no reason to actively resent another person. It doesn’t harm the other person as much as it will harm you. Why are you focusing your energy on someone you don’t even care about? Do you really think they are wasting their valuable time concerning themselves with your actions? Just let it be — don’t engage in malicious behavior, you are beyond that. Leave whatever happened to cause this tension in the past and move on.
7. Failing to appreciate what you have
Instead of focusing on what you think you are missing from your life, try and focus on what you are so fortunate to have. It’s far too easy to look around at the people you surround yourself with and become jealous of what they have. Everyone is fighting a battle within that no one knows about. Just because someone has materialistic possessions does not mean he or she is internally happy. Be grateful for the things that are most important to you and relish them instead of focusing on what you believe to be missing. You have made it this far, so wouldn’t it only make sense that you have everything you need?
You have to seize each opportunity that is presented to you and immerse yourself completely. Do not make excuses because you will only hinder your own personal progress and prevent you from achieving your goals. If you want results, you need to stop making excuses. Work hard and take advantage of all possibilities because that is the only way you will garner the largest and most beneficial results.
By this time in your life, there really is no reason to be insecure. Don’t consume yourself with worry about what other people are thinking — chances are they are way more concerned with themselves than you. Everything you have done up until this point is enough and has gotten you to this place in your life. Confidence is a state of mind; if you believe you are a good person with good values, then it should be enough to build your confidence. Insecurity is something that holds people back more than anything else and it’s a damn shame because the person making you feel the most insecure is yourself.
10. Dealing with drama
The only thing dealing with drama will lead to is anxiety. Why are people drawn to this? I honestly don’t understand. You need to surround yourself with people who are constantly pushing themselves for the better, if you are consistently surrounding yourself with negative people, this will only hinder your progression. Think back to all of the drama you have dealt with in your life and think about if it really has any effect on your life now. The answer to that question is usually no and the time put into dealing with that drama is just not worth it.
article by Ashley Fern — elitedaily.com